Love is in (the) Clare:Billed in some quarters as Europe's biggest singles event, the annual matchmakers festival will swell the borders of the tiny spa town of Lisdoonvarna when 40,000 singletons make the pilgrimage into the Lourdes of Love.

But, if you can't make it to the county of Clare you'll be delighted to hear the Matchmaker experience can now be availed of online via their website. The craic may not be as good in cyberspace but you are guaranteed to avoid any tractor tailback or inclement weather in the comfort of your home.

Plus you can read all about Lisdoonvarna's resident matchmaker - Willie Daly - who seems adequately qualified. He works full time as a horse trader and also runs a "riding" centre.

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Block Clocking:Irish students have a legendary reputation for being as tight as a coiled spring - but one academic is taking scrounging to the next level.

Not for him the occasional fag or the cadged pint. Nope, Shane Murphy wants a free house.

How does he plan to get it ? Well he's built a website containing 2500 blocks each of which can be sponsored by companies for €100 each. 2500 blocks x 100 euro equals a quarter of a million euro which in theory equals Shane's free house.

Simple as that, except it's not. With interest rates on the rise, most Irish people can't afford to pay their own mortgage nevermind someone else's, so customers might be in short supply - meaning Shane could find it hard to get his free house - in fact, he may have to settle for a house of cards.

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Rock It Man:Screen legend William Shatner musical forays have always been bizarre - whether re-interpreting the Beatles or pulping Pulp.

Now, the web has uncovered another classic performance from almost 30 years ago introduced here by Elton John partner-in-rhyme Bernie Taupin:

"I am truly proud once again to present my Rocket Man as interpreted by our host".

You might think his interpretation lacks some pizazz, some je n'ai sais quoihe doesn't sing.

"I'm a Rock-et-man", talks Shatner.

However long it is, I can safely say it won't be long enough...

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The latest Mini Btyes is now online. It's the bluffers guide to the Anti Tourist Camera.

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The Beatlebox:According to one satirical online news report, the idea for Apple's I-pod could have been stolen from crackpot mop-topper John Lennon who had a similar idea way back in 1968!

"Well, it's called the Beatlebox, I thought I'd love to have a portable music player... funnily enough Yoko wanted to call it the I Pod"

And now apparently the surviving Beatles are on the warpath:

Paul McCartney said "you can make computers, but don't make any music."

Unfortunately, John's iPod never made it into production... because... it was made from a fridge and weighed a thousand times more than the one in your pocket.

According to Ringo, "the thing was bloody heavy".

So whatever happened to the prototype? Paul says "I found it, and bought it at an auction, and had it converted back into a fridge".

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Virtual Mothers: Sharing is caring, and now there's a community website for Mums that proves it.

Full of forums and discussions on parenting, pregnancy and all that’s involved in bringing up your little darlings, Mumsnet even has the cheek to allow women to tell each other the things that "They" don't tell you about pregnancy. Now mums to be can discuss the joys of cramps, forgetting your own name, walking like John Wayne, and getting all Doctor Jekyl and Mr. Hyde on unsuspecting spouses.

It's all there. The joy, the pain... but mainly the pain, along with a smattering of maternal concern, sisterhood and the occasional bout of bowel trembling terror, proving the truth of those ancient words of wisdom - sometimes it's hard to be a woman.

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Whispers While You Work:Here's a way to make your 9 to 5 workaday a little bit more bearable - with ambient sound environments designed to deliver relaxation and solitude...

Choose from one of 31 audio environments designed to provide some aural relaxation. Library Lullaby sets the tone for office work, or relax to the sounds of the Bubbling Brook - yes, very nice

But what's the point of pencil parade, the howling hairdryer or the droning dryer? Or the Waterfall desktop ambience described as having nice consistent coverage, subtle tonage, smooth refrain and just a hint of oak?

If I really wanted to listen to something like the droning dryer, I think I'd just...detune... the radio...

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Samuels Greetings:In trying to attract cinema audiences one studio is threatening people with the one thing that everybody is afraid of, namely: "Samuel L. Jackson".

Now you can log on and get personalised messages sent to your friends and family from the biggest, meanest, badass on the planet. Sam wants just one thing from you - “Go see Snakes on a Plane. Because Snakes on a Plane might just be the best ever motion picture ever made!”

Or it might not, Sam isn’t prepared to argue the finer cinematic points and neither am I lest he turn his venom on me. As he told me earlier, “you don’t wanna mess with me on this one”.

It might be already too late - “Daryl, start wasting all your free time surfing the internet, do as I say and you live”

Uh...ok

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Trouble Shooting:Featuring George, a brainless IT support person whose knowledge of computers is thinner than a Vegas dancer's chiffon underpants.

George's Chronicles came to light when one of his fellow techies started posting some of George's more bizarre computer diagnoses.

There's the reference to the person who is having problems with her mouse, which apparently is moving... really weird stuff -the laptop which makes a noise like it is dying, and scores of notes with people having problems with their desktops, having problems with their printers and having problems connecting to the network.

It seems, George is the wrong guy in the wrong place - a bit like the hapless Manuel in Fawlty Towers, except George's grasp of English isn't quite so good.

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Big In Japan: In Japan, they've just caught a glimpse of the next instalment of 24, as Jack Bauer faces a battle through the Tokyo underground to get his hands on... a can of low calorie soft drink.

Okay. It's not 24, but Kiefer Sutherland cashing in. Another in a long line of "Japanders", the name given to Hollywood stars who use their fame to make shedloads selling anything and everything in Japan.

Mike Tyson once packed a punch for Japanese Toyota, Brad Pitt whistled all the way to the bank for a jean company jingle, and if you thought the Hoff was the most laugh-out-loud celebrity on the net, check out the Governor of California flogging Cup Noodle...

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The second Mini Bytes podcast is now online detailing Uri Gellers's experience with an unbendable spoon.

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Colouring Truck:If you didn't get around to washing the car last weekend don't worry, in fact, if anything don't bother. Because Da Vinci may have had a canvas to create his finest masterpiece but all you need is a suitably grimy back window. And your finger.

And if you think we're talking thought provoking scribblings like "Wash me", "also available in white" and "the driver is a benny" then think again

Because when it comes to dirty car art, Scott Wade is a modern day Da Vinci. He's etched the Mona Lisa in car dust to prove it. Along with portraits of himself, Einstein and Mister Bean all on his website

The real Leonardo may well have painted a masterpiece on the Sistine chapel but could he have impressed as much working on a well driven Hiace.

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Stubble Trouble:Beard rash, stubble trouble call it what you want - this is a problem which indirectly affects many women....

...some of whom are fighting back by joining the National Organization of Social Crusaders Repulsed by Unshaven Faces or No Scruf for short - united by their fear of the beard, they ask one simple question...

"What if all women stopped shaving, what kind of sexy world would that be?"Emily Bergstrom is the movements cinematographer who believes it’s "Payback time for scruffy guys" and who’s happy to face fire with fire "Men start shaving or we stop shaving".

Armed only with body hair, these women want to make beard burn a thing of the past..and to help them they've even created their own rap anthem...

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Camera Obscured:According the Laws of Optics, Camera Obscura refers to the phenomenon of an upside down image being created when light travels through a very small hole.

According to the Laws of Holiday, Camera Obscured refers to the phenomenon of a useless photo being created when an oblivious tourist wanders into your shot...
Now, thanks to a nifty website and their even niftier Anti Tourist Software, you can delete these unwanted invaders from your holiday snaps after they're taken. Upload your images and use the anti tourist interface to zap him... or him... or her... or them until you're left with the shot you want...

...but why stop at unwanted tourists, if your relationship has soured since you holidayed then why not zap your partner too in the hopes that someday they'll invent the technology... to let you zap your new partner in.

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Missed Cast:One movie fan site focuses on movie stars and the roles they turned down, auditioned for, got fired from, or simply didn't get.

Apparently, OJ Simpson was almost disastrously cast as Terminator except producers feared he wouldn't be taken seriously.

Mick Jagger must have been stoned when he expressed an interest in playing Dr. Frank N Furter in the Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Mustachioed maverick Tom Selleck was too busy being Magnum PI to play Indiana Jones.

And finally, a major role in Moulin Rouge didn't go to Ozzy Osbourne who certainly had the dance moves - even if most of them were involuntary.

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Hear the first ever Mini Bytes podcast now live

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Digital O'Donnell :Fed up with focusing his activity solely at the blue rinse brigade Daniel O'Donnell has branched out and embraced the digital era.

The results are evident on the brand new Daniel O'Donnell website. Visit it and you'll be immediately accosted with Danny's bizarre combo of perfect parting, steely eyed stare and lilac blazer.

Delve deeper and it gets worse - Dan the man reveals when Buckingham Palace got their own internet presence that he needed to have one as well - nice to see him taking the lead from an 80 year old woman, that he grew up with Bosco - don't ask and there's a link to the Dan fan club where your annual fee gets you a membership card a colour picture a biog and a badge. He may be a wee man but he's got a big wallet...

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Bums on Seats: If you're a long-haired, bearded, backpacking hippy sick of slumming it in greasy cockroach-infested hostels run by greasy flea infested hostel owners then we've found the site for you.

Couchsurfers is a community of people dedicated to “raising collective consciousness and facilitating cultural understanding” by crashing on couches across the globe.

That’s right, now you can bum around from Galway to Guadalupe to Guadalajara cadging free accommodation from fellow couchsurfing members.

So it’s sayonara to the seedier side of world travel and aloha to the warm domestic comfort of someone else’s sofa. And, provided you wash a few dishes and occasionally feed your hosts cat you can do it for nada. Thanks to this site you can be a happier hippier version of Phileas Fogg travelling around the world in eighty couches.

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Talking Poop:It seems one Irish blog has been around almost since the dawn of the digital age. Since then, it's gathered notoriety, a quarter of a million monthly visitors and a vast army of contributors whose prime gift happens to be the gab...

...which is probably why it's called blather.net...The blog covers all blather bases whether it be the intricate details of ancient celtic casanova Niall of the Nine Sausages, a London rendezvous with Britney Spears or a recent report about a Japanese scientist who created a remote controlled robot clone just so’s he could mitch off work.

Cecilia Ahern it ain’t but the site has paid homage to Bertie Ahern with their exclusively designed Bert and Ernie muppa t-shirt.

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The Unbendable Spoon:Over 25 years ago, Uri appeared on the Johnny Carson Show for what we hoped would be a spoonbending walk in the park. But, Johnny's stagehand had other ideas...

“I told them to provide their own props and not to let Geller or his people anywhere near them” and Carson wasn’t helping. “He is really suspicious you know – I’m having a hard time with you”
Cue commercial break and time for Uri to summon his cutlery caressing energies... “right we’re back, Uri was telling me he doesn’t feel strong... I don’t feel strong...I feel like I’m being pressed”... but to no avail. This footage could be construed as evidence that Uri is a spoon bending sham – we’d never say Uri can’t bend spoons – he just can’t bend other peoples spoons.

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Beating Bugs:Today's strangely addictive online game involves a famous animated Japanese character called Unazukin and a plague of insects...

Unazukin is trying to have a picnic and is being bothered by flies, bugs and snails. Using your mouse - that's computer mouse not an actual mouse - you must save the meal from these creeping crawlies by dragging them to be eaten by a fat frog... or a spindly spider...
As you progress the flies and bugs are "upgraded" to snails and wasps who seem to be breeding like rabbits... very confusing...

Well not really, once you read the instructions you’ll suss it in to time but take note the most important instruction directs you to the bottom right corner where you’ll find the sound off button... and relax

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Blue Sky Thinking:At the online home of the Cloud Appreciation Society they believe that clouds are unjustly maligned and that life would be poorer without them.

Their site celebrates natures candy floss in all it’s various hues.

This months cloud of the month is a rather fetching cap cloud which was snapped straddling a mountain in Washington – exuding a sultry charm it’s a real head turner for the connoisseur of all things fluffy and white. Such is the strength of support for the site, some fans have been moved to compose poetry…..Altocumulus Undulatus reads

You win the prix d'or
for décor
of the ozone dome.

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Cyber Space Available: It's the end of the Internet as we know it. No, really, it’s the end of the Internet. Just when you thought knowledge, fluff, cyber related nonsense and meaningless trivia were infinite like an ever expanding cosmos... suddenly it stops...

Yes, now there’s a webpage that boldly proclaims that you’ve reached the end of the Internet as we know it. With “no more links” left, nothing left to click on, and no more worthless time consuming distractions, the creators of this terrifying page congratulate you on reaching your destination and boldly urge you to “turn off your computer and go and do something productive.” And that’s where you get Catch 22 - because the best way to find out how to do something productive is by doing a search... on Google.

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Competitive Relaxation:Computer games are often designed for aggressive, adrenalin fuelled netheads who enjoy the refined art of blowing things up - but one games website manages to be the exact opposite!

Simmer Down Sprinter is an arcade-style two player where players to move runners around a track. So far... so ordinary.

However, this game has one notable difference – it’s controlled by player’s bio-feedback. That means the more relaxed the player becomes, the faster the runner moves around the track. Essentially it is a game of competitive relaxation. Chill out and your player speeds up - tense up, and the player runs backwards.

This game offers the perfect remedy for a society where stress is the number one illness and could take off worldwide - provided the authorities can find a suitable method for testing competitors for traces of valium!

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World Leader on Lead Vocals: U2 recently announced their re-scheduled dates across Australia, New Zealand and Japan and this time around they could be bringing along an unlikely support act….

This song is not a rebel song - this song is Sunday Bloody Sunday. Just in case you’re thinking Bono’s political campaigning had persuaded George W Bush to join the band’s rock n roll circus – think again.

This is the work of some arch video editors who have painstakingly re-constructed one the Presidents speeches to make it sound like a U2 anthem, proving that George makes a better lead vocalist than he does a world leader

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Bunny Foiler: Look up in the sky, it’s a bird, it’s a plane - no it’s a floppy eared carrot munching mammal. Yes, it’s another 30 second Bun-O-Vision parody of the classic Superman movie.

This time our caped crusader is a powerful bunny, able to leap tall buildings with a single bound, rescue smitten female reporters, and stop helicopters falling on the heads of Metropolis’s lettuce loving populace. The “Leapin’ Lepus” even finds time to foil the dastardly plans of the bewigged bunny version of Lex Luthor and turn back time by spinning the world on its axis so that he can smooch his beloved Lois. Mmm, don’t you just love the taste of carrot.

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